I could talk about myself all day, but I won't.

My niece is my best friend and the owner of my heart
I love animals
I abhor meat-eaters
I like to lick a little bit 'o labia - courtesy of Lizzy the lezzy

A magic carpet ride.

I've added a new section at the bottom of every feature for comments. Use them. You're allowed to vote too. Get involved. I insist.

I'm trying to be a real lawyer so I might not have the time to keep you as entertained as I usually do. Be fair! I'm just a little boy!
Ellen played a bit of YouTube video that rocked my world. I had to investigate her and share my findings. I think she's the coolest chick alive and my future ex-wife. She goes by Karmin on YouTube, but Ellen called her Amy. Whatever her name is, she's talented.

How many sexual partners does it take to root you firmly in whore territory?

More than your age (10 | 55%)
Over 20 (5 | 28%)
Over 10 (3 | 17%)
"It's a little bit horrifying just how quickly everything can fall to crap. Sometimes, it takes a huge loss to remind you of what you care about the most. Sometimes, you find yourself becoming stronger as a result, wiser, better equipped to deal with the next big disaster that comes along. Sometimes, but not always."

- Meredith -
Oprah ruined my fun game. That bitch. I'm joking. Some housewife could shank me for saying that. LOVE Oprah. This is Lea T, the world's first tranny supermodel. She's really hot - if we disregard the whole penis thing.
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You know the deal

Manish girl (5 | 28%)
Girly boy (13 | 72%)

Last time I checked, "ex" meant former

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As you know, I've been celibate for the past two years so I've been out of the dating world for a long time. In other words, I've been on a drama-free diet - well, almost. The last time I tried to be with someone, it failed and I decided that it wasn't worth the drama. Despite my aversion to the idea, my friends have encouraged me to consider getting out there and casually dating, possibly even being in a relationship. The more you begin to understand yourself as a partner and, in turn, what you need from a partner, the more your dating pool shrinks. Navigating your way to the right woman should be the only drama that comes with dating.


As if dating and relationships aren't treacherous waters as is, now you have to factor in the uncomfortable and strange, sometimes possessive, relationship your current girlfriend/ "person you hang out with but won't commit to" has with her ex. I am guilty of maintaining strange relationships. I don't see why I should waste all the time and energy I put into a relationship, if it ended relatively amicably. You might find me at an ex's house using her toothbrush or wearing her clothes, you might find an ex at my house using my roll-on. These relationships aren't sexual, just strange. I'm the Casper of ex-girlfriends: friendly and a little weird, but not at all menacing.


Some ex-girlfriends aren't aware that they're no longer in a relationship with your girlfriend/lady because, well, you are. Some hold on even though they're currently seeing someone else. If your romantic relationship with someone is over, you have no right to treat their current girlfriend with anything but respect, unless she gives you a reason to. You have no territory to mark or any title. You cannot threaten her with the possibility of reuniting with her beloved. It makes no sense, to me at least, to cling desperately and protectively to a relationship that has ended.


 And that's because I was looking at it from the current lady's perspective. To me, you're chronically dissatisfied with your own life, so you're systematically trying to interfere with mine with every snide remark and sideways look; instead of letting your ex be happy, with me, you want her to stay with you so that you won't be unhappy alone. But this isn't the case, unfortunately. Troublesome exes have innerlike konflik (sorry, there's just no other way to put it - other than in English). It has little to do with you, more to do with her and the relationship she had with your girlfriend. Your relationship exists because there was an insurmountable problem with hers. And, understandably, it raises feelings of personal deficiency and insecurity in your presence. She may be happy in her new relationship, but she can't understand why her relationship with your girlfriend ended even though they loved one another truly and deeply. Now she has to wrestle with the realisation that they're both capable of having a healthy relationship, just not with each other. Or she's just a bitch. It could be that simple, in which case, I'm sorry.

The pickings are slim, let's not hoard our exes. Before you cause trouble, remember that everyone is someone's ex and you could find yourself dealing with an ex from hell in the near future. If I ever find the courage to date, don't stand in my way. She was your great love, no one disputes that, but your relationship wasn't great or you'd speak of it in the present tense. Sometimes you miss your ex, sometimes you can't remember why you broke up - but you did. If you can't be a Casper, walk away. You owe it to yourself and to her. I hope that every person I've had the pleasure (yeah, not always) of dating finds love and I know it won't be with me. That's okay; I know my love is out there. If you loved someone amazing, hope that she finds someone amazing to love. Gay it forward, it's the right thing to do.

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“You know what really scares me? I liked being fucked up, now more than ever. Is that a kid thing or a family thing?”

- Becca -

Are relationships really worth it?

Yes (8 | 35%)
No (15 | 65%)
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I wish I could clone Whitney from "The Real L Word". She does all the things that I like. Her dreads are amazing - because they're clean. Piercings, tats - I wouldn't be able to walk away. My version wouldn't be a douche though. And she'd be smarter, maybe even well-spoken - if her DNA wouldn't curdle.
Kreayshawn is my latest obsession!The cutest pocket white girl ever and she's mad gangsta, son! I love her!
More of my favourite gangsta white bitch, Kreayshawn. I love her. I hope you love her too!
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I'm here, I'm queer, buy me a drink
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